Ross: And that's why, no matter what mommy says, we really were on a break. Yes we were! Yes we were! Come here gorgeous. Oh! Look at you! You are the cutest little baby ever! You're just a… a little bitty baby, you know that? But you've got… You've got big beautiful eyes… Yes you do… and a… and a big round belly. Big baby butt! I like big butts. I like big butts and I cannot lie / you other brothers can't deny / when a girl walks in with an itty, bitty, waist / anda round thing in your face you get… Oh my God, Emma… you're laughing! Oh my God, you've never done that before, have you? You never done that before… Daddy made you laugh, huh? Well, daddy and Sir Mix Alot…What? What? You… you wanna hear some more? Uhm… My anaconda don't want none / unless you got buns hon… I'm a terrible father!
Rachel: I just finished getting Phoebe all dressed to meet Mike's parents.She's so nervous, it's so sweet!
Ross: Guess what? I made Emma laugh today.
Rachel: You WHAT? And I missed it? Because I was giving a makeover to that stupid hippie?
Ross: Yeah, and it was uhm… it was like a real little person laugh too. It was… it was like uhm… Only… only not creepy.
Rachel: Well… well, what did you do to make her laugh?
Ross: I uhm… Well, I sang… well actually I rapped… Baby Got Back…
Rachel: You WHAT? You sang… to our baby daughter… a song about a guy who likes to have sex with women with giant asses?
Ross: But you know what, if you think about it, it actually promotes a healthy uhm… body image… because… even big butts or uhm… juicy doubles.
Ross: Please don't take her away from me!
Rachel: Okay… aahhh… Please laugh for mommy… Please? Please laugh for mommy… Not funny huh? Oh so, is it… only offensive novelty rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? ’Cause mommy can rap… My name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are…Oh, I can't rap… All right sweet heart… This is only because I love you so much, and I know that you're not gonna tell anybody… I like… big butts and I cannot lie… / You other brothers can't deny… / when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face… Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh!Oh! I like big butts and I can not lie… / You other brothers can't deny… Oh Emma you're laughing! Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little weirdo…
Rachel: Oh you missed it. She was laughing. Oh it was amazing. It was amazing. It was the most beautiful, beautiful sound that…
Ross: Oh I know, isn't it? Ooh… what'd you do to get her to laugh?
Rachel: Oh! You know, I just… couple of things I tried… I just sang a little doo… Itsy Bitsy Spider…
Ross: You sang Baby Got Back didn't you?
Rachel: Nothing else worked. That girl is all about the ass…
Ross: She sweat, wet. got it going like a turbo ’vette.
Rachel: So fellas
Rachel: has your girlfriend got the butt?
Ross: Hell yeah!
Rachel: So shake it!
Ross: Shake it!
Rachel: Shake it!
Ross: Shake it!
Rachel: Shake that nasty butt…
Ross: Baby got back
Rachel: One more time from the top… I like big butts and I can not lie, you other br…
Ross: Rachel please! That is so inappropriate!