How to Speak like a Brit in ten easy steps or ten unmistakable signs that
you're speaking like a British person or something like that...
ALL RIGHT has many different meanings
it can mean HELLO "all right" and the response is the same
of things I guess it should be "Are you alright?" but nobody says that we
don't say the ARE YOU part in fact we don't even say ALRIGHT
often the L sounds more like a W and the T is a glottal stop that's the sound you
make from the back of the throat when you are trying but you don't quite make
a T but it does depend on which part of the UK come from I'm from London so I
say AWRIGH' not ALL RIGHT. It means OK "Can you do this for me?" ALRIGHT
ALRIGHT shows concern. "You fell off your scooter you alright Mate?" "I'm all
right" it can mean SO "Allright everybody let's begin"
2 you use CHEERS not just when drinking.
when you have a drink CHEERS of course but it also can mean thank you
"ah! a matcha latte oh that's my favorite cheers mate" or it can mean
goodbye "well I'm done for the day cheers
3 You call people mate even when they're not your mate
MATE we love to say MATE especially among men but you hear it more and more
often from women too. Use it to talk about friendship
"Hello mate I haven't seen you in ages."
"You're my best mate. Am I your best mate?"
"Well you're in the top 20, probably"
use CHEERS MATE To say thank you.
"Yes I'll look after your cat Tiddles this weekend." - "Cheers mate you're a star."
Be careful though in some situations
CHEERS MATE sounds sarcastic "You drank all my wine and then vomited on my Persian
carpet cheers mate." to make and show surprise "huh mate you should have seen
her face when she found out the big secret." when someone wants to attract
your attention in the street they will often use MATE
this is just for men though "Excuse me mate. How do I get to Trafalgar Square." oi
mate, you dropped your your wallet over there." so if you want to get the attention of a
British guy then don't say "excuse me" or "excuse me
sir "or "excuse me my friend" say "excuse me mate. "
4 you employee understatement fairly often.
So understatement is presenting something as less important
than it really is. Yes we do use words like amazing, incredible, fantastic but
often we like to let others read between the lines. Being too emotional can be
seen as a bit vulgar by British people that's why we employ words like fairly,
quite, pretty, rather. "You've just won ten billion euros on the lottery how do you
feel." - "fairly pleased actually." - "You've just finished running a double marathon
in the desert, how do you feel?" - "Pretty tired to be honest." "You've lost your job
and your wife ran away with your best friend all in the same week are you all right?"
medal in world-record time." "Yeah I'm rather pleased."
LetThemTalk in Paris is the best language school in the world OK sometimes we don't use understatement.
so sometimes British people when they're
talking in the singular will use US instead of ME why we do this I'm not
sure I guess we're being more indirect so it sounds a bit more polite but let
me show you what I mean here's some examples: "Can you give us a minute? I just have to
"Can you lend us £20 until next Thursday?"
"Oh give us a moment I'm just gonna finish this."
"Hello darling give us a kiss."
6 you laugh at double entendres.
Now double entendre is a French
term that we use in English now in French they don't say double entendre so
if you're French please don't write angry comments to me I know it's not
correct French but that's what we say. So a double entendre is a statement that has
a double meaning and often the second meaning is funny
and sometimes a bit sexual or indelicate. For example "I went to the market today
and the woman in the fruit stall had really big melons." One reason why we love
Double entendres is because a long time ago theatre, stage shows and later TV, was
censored. Obvious sexual content was forbidden and the way you got around
this was with innuendo and double entendre and they're still popular today
I see her every day at the vegan cafe she's eats cauliflower and peas (pees).
When I look through the telescope I can...
When I look through the telescope I can see Uranus. The man in supermarket was
going to give me a small bag so I shouted out "have you got a big one" he looked
embarrassed. Even Shakespeare loved double entendres he used them often
and if you want an example Google HAMLET, COUNTRY MATTERS and you'll see what I mean.
7 You say bloody all the bloody time
British people like to use BLOODY. When we're happy "That was bloody good." When
we're angry. "You spilt my pint you bloody bastard." When we're sad "I don't bloody
believe it! She left me for that bloody bloody idiot." when we're surprised
"Bloody hell! that woman is a man maybe I should stop dating her." We can even put
bloody in the middle of a word abso-bloody-lutely and this is called
TMESIS. TMESIS and I think it's the only word in English language
which begins with TM. "Are you coming away with me to Goa?" oh yeah! absobloodylutely."
8 you are an expert at reading between the lines.
Now I've travelled quite a lot
and lived in a number of different countries and what I've noticed is that
reading between the lines is quite a British trait. So British people often
don't like to speak directly or in a confrontational way especially in formal
situations such as in a work environment. Other nationalities will often tell you
what they think while the British will circumvent conflict. Now this is a
generalization, a big generalization and I'm sure there are many, many exceptions
so tell me what you think anyway I guess I should give an example of that
so imagine I'm in a meeting how to solve the problem of pollution in
London so somebody gets up and says "Yeah I've got brilliant idea, we move London
to the countryside because there is no pollution there. An island off the north
coast of Scotland for example." A non-british response might be "that's a f**ing stupid
idea you're an idiot." but the British response might be "OK,
interesting, interesting we've got fairly busy agenda
now so let's talk about this another time."
British often say INNIT and this can be right or wrong grammatically speaking.
Now when INNIT means ISN'T IT then it's perfectly correct and I might use it
myself when I'm speaking informally. "It's hot innit?" "This is best pub in London, innit?"
"That's the thief, innit?" But now you're seeing INNIT used as a question tag for
everything and that sounds wrong. "He doesn't like bananas, innit?" "You're my
no...no "He doesn't like bananas,
does he?" "You're my best friend, aren't you?" I guess if everyone is using
it then it's right that's what they say that's how language changes but I'm
having a hard time with this one.
10 Crime and PUNishment
So there was a Spanish magician and he said "UNO, DOS" and then he disappeared
without a TRES (trace). A pun is a play on words when two words sound the same or almost
the same and you can make a joke on it and British love them. If you don't
believe me then just look at the names of fish and chip shops in Britain for
example The Codfather, The plaice to be. Plaice is the name of fish of course. Frying
Nemo, the Fiscoteque, For Cod's sake. Newspapers love them too. Now a long time
ago in 1984 there was a dispute when British exporters of lamb were attacked
in France by French farmers who were unhappy with the cheap imports of
British lamb and they burnt the British lorries and the headlines of the Sun
newspaper was L'AMBUSH. Even though I'm not a fan of the Sun I must admit that
it's a brilliant pun on the words LAMB and AMBUSH and has the L apostrophe to
indicate the connection with France. I've tuned my ukulele and now I'm going to
tuna fish. So if you want to make English friends then make a pun and